You're Too Young To Be My Boss

About a year ago I engaged with a firm to do some operations work on their site. They provided services to colleges and universities.

When they first reached out to me, they were rather quick to respond to my proposal. They seemed to think the quote was very reasonable. I also did some due diligence of my own, checking the guy’s profile on the about page. I noticed he was 25, rather young, but I didn’t think much else of it.

We discussed whether they wanted fixed hours. Since those would limit my availability we both agreed a more flexible approach made sense. This worked well for me as I tend to shift and schedule time liberally, so I can be efficient & flexible with clients, but still have a life too.

Trouble Brewing

As we began to interact the first week, I sensed something amiss. My thought was that the first week you work with a client, they feel you out. They see how you work, when you work, how much gets done and so forth. This provides a benchmark with which to measure you. If either party is unhappy with how things are going, they discuss and make adjustments accordingly.

What was happening in this case was the guy started pestering me. I began to get incessant messages on instant messenger asking for updates. I had none. I explained that I would contact him as things were completed, or if I had questions.

This was only two days into the project. I’d barely gained access to the servers!

The Fever Pitch

After discussing my concerns on the phone, the gentleman kind of glossed them over. From there the pestering continued. I explained that I could not be available to him any hour of the day, while the engagement only provided for one half of a week. This began to interrupt me from other client work, so I had to signoff of instant messenger. Not good.

The Pot Boils Over

We spoke again on Monday briefly, and decided to connect the following day. From there the pestering began anew, and I began to lose my patience. I insisted that we speak on the phone before work would continue. I felt the problem was deteriorating and discussing over text would only make things worse.

He emailed me back as I was then offline. In his email he ordered me to come online. While he sat in a meeting, he explained, he could not take a call! Nevertheless he insisted we resolve it during the meeting. Distracted no less.

[quote]It was then that I started receiving text messages on my personal mobile phone from the guy, pestering me to get online so we could resolve our communication problem! You can’t make this stuff up![/quote]

The Fallout

Eventually we did both get on the phone, and I explained I had reached wits end. After only ten short days of working together, we had both set strong precedents and they were obviously not compatible. He asked if I would stay on longer, and reconsider working together, and I said I would think about it.

I chose not to dig a deeper hole, and let him know I wouldn’t be invoicing for previous the weeks work.

The Lessons

o beware age differences – in our case an 18 year gap
o pay attention to management styles – self-starters don’t need micromanaging
o be patient & keep communicating
o allow for an exit strategy that is amenable to both parties

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  • nickd

    Exactly! I think people who find themselves in management positions fail to understand they are working with people cooperatively and micromanagement doesn’t breed productivity for anyone. Sure they have been “managing” people under them for two years or so, and consider themselves capable but it is disastrous once they become the problem in the situation. They fail to correct the problematic situation, thinking that they are above improving their own behavior and create more of a problem for the team and others when they point the finger elsewhere.

    • hullsean

      @nickd well said.